there's alot of it but i think kita letak yang "sedang2 aje"... cun jugak!!

well i totally 4got about my blog here but many things happened lately... what i do? take a deep breath, cursing,  put on my ear bud and play Breaking Benjamin's songs (kindda like let Ben curse whatever the culprit did) and move on...

so i'm in UMS now... back to the best place ever...-ish... huhuhu

no... it's not all bad.. i had a great time since i arrive and still have a great time ^^~

well i missed my family... how could i'm not missed them? umi n ayah will berangkat ke Mekkah in a week n i'm not gonna be there to sent them to airport (again...) and (AGAIN) ayah buat tahlil n makan2 kat umah but i'm not at home for 5  years STRAIGHT!!!  but the second matter wasnt as important as the 1st one so i will let it go... JIHAD bak kata ayah n ummi...

adik izzati with her scars like lanun
hehe.. but ALHAMDULILLAH
she is alright.. ^^~

well maybe this is so past year thing but my family matters always present thing no matter what and one of the things is that adik izzati had an accident.. she's playing with me and suddenly she fell... her face right on the glass cabinet n it was so bad.. her face kindda "torn" (okay... the word might be very strong but i swear that was so bad and i feel guilty as hell until now) and was hospitalized for 2 days...

and now 2 be honest i feel like my brain is like a steak (gotta say sorry coz the words might be weird but i mean it and i am kindda JK- jiwa kacau.. huhuu) and i think it is now fried... extra crispy (lapaq plok~~)

reason??

with my Lalik.. thanks for
keeping me sane here..^^~

• my FYP of course!!! 
• i need 2 upgrade my pointer.. damn serious... 
• my parents keep repeating that i need to be responsible n make them proud (not that they never felt that n not that i never felt those weight on my shoulder but..idk)
• i need to FOCUS but (this might sound crazy) but i cant take my head off of upcoming Supernatural Season 7.... (not that i am a geek but if some ppl read my previous2 entry... they should know what happen next~~~ leave the motivational movies etc3...)
• MORE UPCOMING THINGS THAT I"M VERY SURE THAT I WOULD NEVER GET AWAY WITH!!!

so i am hoping everything will be alright...

owh.. the things that bugs me more than anything in the world is my siblings... who would take care of them with no adult around.. but i always keep my game face on saying to my parents that my brothers and sisters (especially anis n izzati) will be just fine but like my parents.. i'm worried like hell... i dont trust others then my own siblings to take care of my other siblings and yea sorry if i said i dont trust others but that is the truth.. not even my grandparents, uncle, aunt or anyone... so dont bother urself to come n tell me that we are family... 

one thing that make them (those who i feel never ever will  earn my trust to take care my siblings and the one that i let Ben's "curse" them over n over) deserve that is when they told me this right on my face

" along macam mana nak ada tanggungjawab?? umi n ayah nak pegi Mekkah tapi along buat x kesah dengan kebajikan adik2... bukannya lecturer tu x paham n  bagi along amik cuti.. tapi along yang x nak kan?? nak lari dari tannggungjawab jaga adik2 kan?? bukan orang lain tu.. adik2 along jugak!! kalau susah sangat nak dapat cuti berenti belajar aje lah! xkan benda simple macam tu pon orang kena ajar?"

"umi tu patut x payah pegi lagi Mekah tu.. sapa nak jaga adik2? "

i make promise i take care of every
single one of them since i look up to
my dad like my previous lifetime n
i will keep it

so... here (even i know that person didnt read my blog but who knows right?) i really wanna say 2 u... u may say this in front of my face n act all innocent but i dont care about what u think..

 i am not responsible? maybe... but if u want me to call myself quit after 3 years of hard work (and it's my final year)... not a chance... my parents wont like it and i will not too... besides ur thought is worthless... n the things u said about my mum.?? either u are really stupid or u jealous... either way another bad press on my parents.. (i usually dont do this but this is definitely deserve exception BIG TIME) u will be facing my wrath n of course the i wish u'll burn! but thanks to some gene i got from my dad ( i wonder y u dont have it)... i will smile n rub on ur nose later on... my dad always said karma will get them...

see...i'm not that so sweet patience girl (for some reason)....

that's that... adios!!!